Not That Funny


       The Stevie Nicks Pervert is a difficult man to live with.
       There are the obvious reasons, just from looking at him. The ones to do with how soft his hands are, and how uneven his hair is. You may shrug, but you learn these things, with men. Perhaps you've been loving 'real' ones all this time. I don't know.
       The Stevie Nicks Pervert wants to say something to you about his heart being as beautiful and brittle as a Lindsey Buckingham production, but he played you 'Eyes of the World' once and you thought it was shit.
       (That sentence itself was another reason: You should never want a man with similes like that.)
       Just remember: he's sang with more girls under bridges than he's slept with; than he's even met, somehow.

<               >